Ami Tola

My Love Letter For Valentine’s Day….


I know that this isn’t the most conventional love letter for Valentine’s Day. And the picture of Alain Delon isn’t really an equivalent to the typical hallmark card with red roses , little angels, and all that girly stuff but bare with me and let me explain.

I promise you it will be worth it.

You see, I find the resemblance between you and Alain Delon just remarkable and I cannot lie to you – it was the first thing I noticed when I met you on that train.  Forgive my bold aesthetic associations, but I know the value of beauty and it is priceless! It is what inspires us, what motivates us, what makes us fall utterly in love because we,  as human beings, are always in search of something divine. I believe that beauty is the most convincing recreation of divinity. It is the primary protoplast of our emotional attachment to life. Therefore it is the first thing that  makes us love life without us realizing it and live life with passion. Beauty is perfection only when it is in its most natural and unconstrained form. That’s why it is so rare and so dearly cherished.

Throughout the centuries people have come up with endless ways to preserve beauty… Epistemologically, art is the greatest way of  them all. Take Michelangelo’s David for example. It is the symbol of human’s beauty.

For the few of those, who say  ’ Looks don’t matter, it’s the personality that counts!’ Well, try telling that to Da Vinci, Van Gogh, Dega etc. I haven’t seen Dega drawing personalities. But I have seen his divine captures of the female body in the most elegant motion known to man. Was Dostoyevsky right when he said “Beauty is going to save the world” ? I believe he was… I believe that beauty saves the world every day. 

Now lets go back to the beginning. I wanted to give you one of the most striking examples of falling in love with real, natural beauty:

Alain Delon was a world-wide renowned actor, whose sex appeal and gorgeousness literally drove women mad. He was also considered to be the most beautiful actor of the 20th century and the sexiest man on the planet. Alain Delon could have had every single woman on Earth if he wanted to! A couple of promising female stars almost ended their lives, because they couldn’t have him. Rumor has it that one of them actually did –  Romy Schneider. That’s just how dangerous his beauty was.  

You don’t just look like Alain Delon. I think that not only in terms of looks you’re a much better version of the man he used to be, when he was young (he’s in his 70s now). And yes, having such a great big heart and a wonderful personality is another bonus, that only makes you more incredible.

 I thank, from the bottom of my heart, all the stupid women who have passed by you and didn’t see what an amazing guy you are, and just how gorgeous you are. I thank those stupid, stupid, stupid girls who lost you. Thank God for their absence of basic knowledge, sense of reality, and total lack of good taste! Thanks to them, now I get to have the most beautiful guy of the 21st century with the greatest heart and cherish him, and I will do that with pleasure… And with passion! I love you, Nick! Happy Valentine’s Day!


P.S. Sorry my girliness couldn’t resist itself… 


The Confused Conqueror – Nonsense 1

Nonsense 1


Bar “Sitting on a stump”

Every story in the history of the universe has the ability to become great,especially when there aren’t any witnesses left, to be recalled.

The Confussed Conqueror

    My new friend – The Confussed Conqueror hadn’t been to a bar ever since he cosmocrashed on the Dizzy Planet. Having that in mind I decided that it’s more than mandatory for me to take him to bar “Sitting on a stump”, but before I did so, I told him a story about an incident that happened during one of the many meanwhiles in my life.

Bar “Sitting on a stump” is the most stumped up bar I’ve ever been to. It is located on one of the very few and lots of  insensible, nameless hills on our dizzyful planet. I often spend my days there even though I rarely am there on the days when I’m not there. I must tell you that this bar is not much different from any other bar. It has it’s regular customers, one bartender devoted to his work, a lot of booze, no food and last but not least – a living mascot- the teetering, dusty, old, raggy-looking, sack of bones – the tom cat unusually named – Hungry Begger. No one remembers the cat’s original colour, but 64% of the cats on the planet are reddish so we decided to add him to their color group. We, dizzlings, think that every tom cat with such magnificent privilege – “bar mascot” should have it’s own official, authentic color. Hungry has always had this exceptional tallent. On the most misfortunate for any cat place, in the most misfortunate moment, he can catly plop without even thinking and loll exactly in the middle if the most unwisely chosen spot. That way Begger often gets cursed at, steped on, or hit with heavy objects.

Тhe other day – before the day before it was cold and dark – а good reason for any dizziling to drag himself over to Bar “Sitting on a stump”, to order Coctail “Bye Blue Mood” and get into a weird unconstrained conversation with a few pie-eyed strangers. While I was sitting in the corner of the bar table , chatting with my good old friend Sipp Madeira – son of the magnificent Tempranio, I overheard bits of an interesting, absolutely full of interestingness,conversation from the table next to us. Three unusual adherents of good port wine, misterios historic events and cheap raincoats, loudly argued on the very significant event in our history -
“Who came up with the idea of the bar and how was it built?” This is a subject  that interests every newcomer to “Bar Sitting on a stump”.
I approched the three strangers and got acquainted with them. They turned out to be good old men. Seizmos Shaker  was a former resident of the Groundquake planet. He was it’s seismologist but after the planet disintegrated, he’s become forcibly retired and has come to our planet to live through the remainder of his life without any shakexperience whatsoever.
Albedo Accretionado used to be a cleaner of the universe. His proffesion was one of the very few and many unique professions known to the universe before it seized to exist. His job was to clean the universe from dense unwanted matter  by every cosmic object. He also absorbed and radiated light, so that it can be always in motion. Universelings believed that this way  it doesn’t weight on the universe. While he was still active it used to be known to universelings that photons don’t have mass. Since his retirement, that statement has become very controversial, almost out of control. Thanks to Albedo, the space was pure and spaceful until the Universal Council decided that every one left out in space, wheather or not he absorbs potetial waste, has the potential to become waste himself, and therefore there is no need to have such profession.
Albedo had a little distortion due to his many years of working as a cleaner of the universe. He was able to absorb the indoor ilumination eliminating all of the energy sources. Whenever he was worked up a bit, he started to distort the absorb/radiate correlation laws and it was  quite dangerous to be around him. Puansur Distance was an ufologist.